As some of you know, I'm about to release SHORTCOMINGS for wide distribution via amazon.com and book stores. I've been re-reading the book and getting feedback from a few people who have read the book in its previous incarnations. I'm considering replacing Andrew's back story... It would be PART FOUR and we would pick up with Danny and Colin in PART FIVE. I love the story and people have responded really well to it, but I'm not sure if, in the context of the rest of the book, it just comes off as distracting. Andrew is a supporting character and while his back story does give some insight into how he ended up at Androfiles, I'm not sure if it would come off as superfluous.
Obviously, this is something I have to decide on my own. If I had a proper editor, I would consult them. But I'm just wondering if you guys have any thoughts on the subject... Chime in.
A separate part may be unwarranted for a minor player. However, his backstory would add complexity to the consequential impetus of Anderson's demise. (i.e. Anderson's insistence on barebacking led to the circumstances creating the perfect storm for his revenge-laden disappearance.) Perhaps you could truncate Andrew's backstory into an expositional passage, including only the pivotal points, following the expository thoughts (already in the book) that delineated Andrew's acceptance and willingness to oblige Anderson's perilous request for an "unprotected performance"; this would also provide the circumstances surrounding his entrance into pornography. Ooooooh, and it could actually tie in quite nicely with Andrew's, presumed, subconscious yearning for a parental replacement to his mother and father who rebuked him and his lifestyle.
ReplyDeleteI just finished the book and enjoyed it as is, but from my own writings I know you wouldn't be asking the question unless you had a nagging feeling. So, my advice is just based on my own experience and I would say to make the change and allow yourself to sit with it and see if whatever is moving you to this change is settled and your vision feels complete. Technically, for me, the way the book is laid out, any additional information wouldn't have been a problem, especially if you deemed it necessary.
ReplyDeleteOkay - I've read the book twice and love it. I read the Andrew excerpt before my copy arrived. Wanted to know more about Andrew then. Now? I don't know - Maybe getting more into the reason why he refuses to bareback. Maybe he could have met up with Clem some years later. Clem is nothing like he remembered. Just because Andrew was gone didn't mean that their relationship remained "secret" Clem was left to deal with bullying alone in addition to being so distraught over allowing Andrew to just disappear from his life that. He did finally move to Chicago after graduating but didn't find Andrew until some years later. He'd been "reckless" resulting in him contracting HIV. Unfortunately because he had no support and the years of bullying made him fill like he didn't matter, he ended up not being treated.....I don't know, just an idea.
ReplyDeleteI would love to see Jaime and Rafael run into each other. I know that he cheated and he's gonna need to do so much to gain Rafael's trust again. The process of him trying to win him back could be interesting. Again, just an idea.
Much Love,
Pammy
I think Andrew should have his own book. It could take us though his life after being kicked out and finding himself alone,To working for Anderson in finding himself in over his head. "Andrew's story is very interesting."
ReplyDeleteP.S. I have to agree with Pammy on Jaime. (Jaime is so cool with his) he has some major shit that he is dealing with that Rafael should know about. Jaime is in trouble,and Rafael needs to be there for him. Or somebody!